The Roche Report

Charlie recently turned 5 (!!!). Which means it is also my 5th birthday as a mom. Both feel super significant! I'm not typically super focused on my kids milestones, but her fifth birthday has hit me a bit differently than some of the other milestones - it (and she!) feels so big! It's hard to believe how much our lives have changed in the past five years - it feels both long and short. Another element of having a five year old is that she is very interested in her story in a way she hasn't been, so I've been particularly nostalgic telling her about the day before she was born, finding out I was going to be induced (I was a wreck with nerves), memories of the whole day in the hospital (the chick made us wait!), and then getting to meet our chick who came out eyes wide open and needing to know what was going on and who was there, which consequently is something that has never stopped.  Charlie is fun, funny, and whip smart. I'm amazed by everything she knows - and ho...

As part of my focus on creating an awesome environment for the women on my team, I host a monthly call featuring awesome female executives (both IBM and client) talking about their career path and talking about specific topics / issues. We recently had Katrina Alcorn, who is the new General Manager of IBM Design. I could wax poetic about the call -- as well as how awesome it is to have a woman leading IBM Design - but I will focus on one thing she said at the end of the call.  As context, Katrina wrote a book about burning out as a working Mom ( Maxed Out - American Moms on the Brink ) and at the end, she highlighted 10 things to do right now to support yourself (and support women at work). Of the 10, three especially jumped out to me. 1) Practice Saying No, 2) Tell your partner what you need (and for me this was tell EVERYONE what you need - saying out loud what I need is something I personally struggle with), and 3) Be an ally to other women. I asked Katrina about this on th...

When I was little, my parents used to complain about my approach and style - to the point that they often told me that I was being bossy. This was such a frequent occurrence in my house that one year in high school, my mom gave me a little wall sign as a joke (I think?) that said "I'm not bossy, I just have better ideas."  It was frustrating to me at the time, because I DID have better ideas (I'm joking, I think).  In all honesty, I had some personal challenges at home that probably led to me being more assertive (or as my parents called me, bossy), including a really loving mom who struggled with alcoholism and probably ADD, which led to me needing to take charge of personal details like scheduling doctor's appointments, hair appointments, getting school supplies, etc. at a fairly young age (like in elementary school). As I have since learned in therapy and through attending family therapy at my mom's alcohol rehab, a fairly common reaction for children of al...

“We are standing together, shoulder to shoulder, all working for one common good. And the good of each of us as individuals affects the greater good of the company.” – Thomas Watson, Sr., Chairman & CEO, IBM, 1915-1956 I am really proud that I work for a company that embraces the power of diversity; and I am really proud that I have an incredibly diverse team working for me - from all angles: gender, race, age, and, of course, LGBTQ+ as well.  I’ve reflected a lot about what I want to say about Pride this year and how I can continue to support (and/or continue to improve how I support) my LGBTQ+ colleagues. This year stands out for me given our particularly charged political environment and understanding how challenging and completely worrisome it is to my LGBTQ+ friends and colleagues. So, for me it is a moment that I wanted to emphasize how I think about being an ally at work. I think one particular challenge of LGBTQ+ experience at work is the feeling of constantly having to...

This blog is a guest blog written by two members of my team who have recently returned from paternity leave. I asked them to write this upon reflecting on the most common question I get when I travel for work: " Who's taking care of your kids ?" I wrote a whole blog on this subject is, but the net / net is that I think an answer to helping women have a more significant role in the workplace is enabling Dad's to be equal caregivers to their kids - a big element of which is paternity leave.  IBM has an awesome parental leave package - for all parents. But, I've heard many examples of men more or less being gaslit about taking their leave. "What are you going to do?" "You're not really busy, right - let's talk for a couple of minutes", "how are you going to hit your targets if you take leave?" (obviously this is a problem for women in sales TOO!)! Thankfully, in the current era, I think this "shaming" around leave doesn...

I've recently returned to somewhat frequent work travel. In that return to travel, I have been reminded of the question that most got under my skin pre-pandemic. Without fail, when I am traveling for work, someone will say to me some version of: "it's so great you are here! but.... who is with the kids?????" "Is your mom watching the kids while you are gone?" "Is your nanny spending the night at the house while you are gone?" I often think this tremendously well meaning question - that is almost always said in a tone of empathy (wow! you are doing so much! how are you taking care of your kids too?) - is really actually a pretty offensive question to my husband. The assumption is that my husband could not POSSIBLY be with the kids while I am gone - and if he is, he most certainly could not be alone. I am a HUGE Dr. Becky Kennedy fan and recently listened to two of her podcasts - one with Reshma Saujani - the founder of Girls Who Code, and one with E...

Throughout my career, I've spent a lot of time coaching young professionals and one of the things that I've observed is that the colloquial language that is often used amongst peers is one of the biggest detractors in what is coined as "executive presence" but is really just speaking articulately in a business setting. Executive presence is a nebulous term - kind of along the lines of "professional maturity."  I started making a list of common phrases that I hear and/or have coached people on - but then took it to the "streets" aka my team slack channel, asking what words they have worked to stop using in professional settings. What was interesting in the conversation was people chiming in with requests for help (UGH I DO THAT - what are better ways to stop?), and then awesome suggestions for help. Below are some of my thoughts - and some of the team's thoughts. I've color coded the big female / male ones as well: Ending a statement in a qu...